In the year 1251

Robert Grosseteste was a very exacting Bishop of Lincoln. His monks and nuns never liked his visits because he went to great lengths to ensure they were living the holy life. He went overboard in this banner year, however, when he ordered the nuns to be fondled to see if they were really chaste. It is written he ‘caused their breasts to be squeezed’, so presumably the abbess did the fondling. No one thought to call this #medievaltoo. In December, Henry III took his court to York for the marriage of his 11-year-old daughter Margaret to 10-year-old King Alexander III of Scotland. As expected, there were so many drunken brawls that the actual wedding was performed in secret on the morning after Christmas, when the merrymakers were likely to be asleep or hung over. Any disappointment over missing the ceremony would have been made up for by the feast afterwards. On the menu 170 boar, 1,400 deer, 7,000 chickens and 25,000 gallons of wine. First come, first served.

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